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oh lord!
OK, let me start off by saying this cummins is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a truck to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Dodge would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.This truck has been to hell and back, twice, and has the scars to prove it. So if you can't handle being seen behind the wheel of this biblical, fire breathing, dragon slaying hero because it has a few purple hearts, move on.This truck was engineered by 3rd degree ninja pirate super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous Nancy boy, contradictory decor, in the form of paint plastered all over the truck. This truck looks legit because it is.This brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a turbo Cummins diesel to fly down the road or to outrun the cops and has a 5-speed transmission so you know grandma won't be taking off with it when you're not looking. It's saved my bacon more than once. It's got special blood/gore resistant steering wheel cover. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. (NOTE: I cut myself fighting a streetbiker who looked at me funny and used the first aid kit, a replacement kit is available for an additional $100 and comes with Gentleman's Jack.)My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $3500 but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $500 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Katy Perry concert anymore.There's only 225,000 miles on this hellcat from Planet Kickass since purchased in 94'. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then reply to this ad. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with one of my ladies, but send me a message and I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Pabst Blue Ribbon while we listen to Johnny Cash.Also I will entertain trade offers. I am looking for a smaller, less manly, 4x4. but will entertain all offers. So if you own a planet let me know, I have always wanted one of those. Also would be interested in a full size welder plus cash. By full size welder I mean a miller 210, 250, 212, 252, or something along those lines.Edit:the truck is a 5-speed, 4wd. it has power windows. It runs like a thief in the night. This truck will run longer than anything else listed on lakeland craigslist right now.I was flagged yesterday when I originally posted the truck. Please dont flag me, you can email me and let me know what I am doing wrong. I promise that I will fix the ad to be within the law.I work night shift, so I will respond today after I wake from my hibernation, and kick these ladies out of my bed.
